Wednesday, August 26, 2009

They Are Not Kidding About The Water in Mexico

My brother and I recently took cruise down to Cozumel. To give you even a hint of the four days that followed after we boarded the boat… We were almost too drunk to make it to the safety drill. We were sitting in our room with our life jackets on contemplating how we could hide from the crew.

After this monstrosity of a vacation, we both come down with some kind of viral shit that could knock a linebacker on his ass. Eric started to feel bad while we were still on this ship; you can imagine how much fun he was on the last night and the 5 hour trip home the next day. I of course thought he was being a pansy and that he had just had too much “fun” in Mexico. We fought like two crack heads over the last piece of a rock. It was not pretty.

To my utter disbelief, I come down with the same shit he has been “whining” about for two days. All of the sudden I feel like I have been run over with a dump truck that subsequently reversed itself and went ahead and ran back over me. I have a 104 fever and would really like to shoot myself in the head.

I realize at this moment that I have made a fatal mistake. I had shipped Eric off to my mothers to avoid any further gun slinging from our encore of cowboys and Indians. I could just picture him being waited on hand and foot by the greatest caretaker this side of the equator. He would be getting five star resort mints on your pillow kinda treatment and here I was hunkered down at my place with a blanket covered in dog hair and a refrigerator that had not seen any resemblance of food in weeks. Immediate action had to be taken. Eric flew home the next day and I could not get to my mothers fast enough.

The next evening I found myself snuggled in freshly laundered bedding and things being brought to me like I was some kind of royalty. Even my pug was grateful to have blown that Popsicle stand. I spent the next 5 days either sweating or chattering my teeth. I did not get out of bed for much and I had to be reminded that it might be a good idea to shower. Thanks mom.

Eric and I eventually made our peace and we have put away our claws. I realized he was not a pansy and he got to tell me that he was glad that I got sick. All in all, everything worked out in the end.